Thanks a lot Bin Laden! D-Bag.
I move around more than a drunken army guy knocking up gals in bars, so the DMV is often a regular visit for me.
Living in the DC area evidentially makes people more paranoid and magically give government workers the ability to make up laws. While taking my regular visit to the DMV, this time to switch over from Georgia stuff to Virginia, I happened to notice that my name was awkwardly misspelled on my birth certificate. Figuring this wouldn’t be such a big deal, seeing as I’m also contracted to work with the FAA (means I had to go through 3 months of clearance and background checks) that something as simple as two letters being reversed on a piece of wax paper (it feels like wax?) would prevent me from getting my new licenses and registration.
Complaints aside from waiting ridiculously long periods of time and dealing with strange rednecks shoving things up my cars ass to ensure the emissions are not harmful, generally the DMV isn’t that bad. I took the day off work, had all 30 documents in order and I wait in line. I go up to the desk jocky, who seemed to not speak English very well and gave him all my required paperwork and their filled out forms. After studying my birth certificate for a good 20 minutes (I guess I just have that terrorist/non-american vibe being an almost albino white guy born in Chicago) and he stumbles onto the realization that everything I have provided says my name is spelled “Elliot,” but for some strange reason the birth certificate says “Elloit.”
He then disappears and talks to his manage, comes back and says, “Sorry but your name must be exactly how your title says on your birth certificate, so we can’t do anything for you.” He then goes on to say that it’s against the law for him to give me a title transfer or local license. His solution was to print out a list of numbers so I can talk to someone in Chicago to correct the stupid misspelling. Long story short, he made up an imaginary law, because I went to a different DMV today and the lady didn’t even question it. I showed her my work credentials and apparently that made everything magically better. If I didn’t get it today, I would have had to wait four months for the certificate to get corrected, be three months late on renewing my plates (probably get pulled over and get a ticket, adding more shit to the list) and also not be able to register my car where I live, causing me to not have a parking spot. All in all this is due to bureaucrats and retards (he was a re-tard) employed by our government, oh and that asshole Bin Laden.
